I am actually happy today, despite this.

*This blog is me being the kind of person I get annoyed at, keep that in mind.*

So... I sometimes wonder how other people think of me. Not like, if they think I'm nice or anything (althought that too) I think about whether they care about me. Because I really care about people. It's almost ironic that one of my friends said in a speech that I don't care what other people think of me. I sometimes think it's the people who don't seem to care that care the most. I spend way too much of my time caring.
I think I might be a natural stalker or something because I like to know what people are doing... I'm so weird.

I don't know if people feel anywhere near how I feel about my friends. I value every second I spend with them. When I get an email from a friend I can't help but smile. I try my hardest to spend time wiht them because that's what makes me happy. Sometimes it feels like they do not like being with me.
I'm aware that I can be very annoying. I tell stupid stories and I never shut up. Annoying. But I try really hard to stop doing things like that coz I know they annoy people. I want people to want to be around me. There are times when I try to figure what makes me want to be with people so that I can do it too.

I'm so clingy and annoying and ridiculously jealous.
My friend tells me she's going somewhere with another of my friends, I must be there.
I'm terrified of being left out and not being friends with them anymore.
I want them to ask me to do things with them, because they want to be around me.

Complain, complain, complain.
Dude, I really never shut up.

This blog makes no sense because I'm babbling.
And yes, I am showing this to my friends because I want them to know and I could never say this stuff to them in person.
My biggest worry right now is that they'll see the link to my blog and ignore it.